General Vice President of Multiple Tasking
Large generous corporation seeks talented individual for long term contract employment. Applicants must posses a Bachelors of Science Degree from a respected university.Further requirements are listed below.
1. You must have a dependable vehicle with insurances for work as travel is required. We don't pay mileage or subsidize for use of your car. (truck or large SUV is preferred)
2. Since you will travel applicants must have a cell phone with GPS and laptop computer to communicate with home office HQ.
3. Applicants must maintain a complete set of tools hammers, saws, wrenches, brooms and brushes.
4. Must be bilingual in English Spanglish and Profanity.
5. Able to work overtime at nights and weekends as our schedules demands.
6. You must have a clean work history and no criminal backgrounds are accepted.
7.You should maintain a credit card and credit score of over 700 and have access to checking and savings at a major bank. We sometimes ask you make purchases for us as we offer 100% reimbursements paid on the 31st day of each month.
8. You must be able to lift a 100 lbs and be in top physical condition.
9. Background check and drug analysis fee of $100 dollar paid by each applicant.
Health Insurance: will be deducted from you salary and coverage is limited to healthy people only
Holiday Pay: we recognize all holidays whether religious or national however holidays must be celebrated on the first and third Saturday of each month
Vacation and Sick Pay: all vacation and sick days will be approved for the second and fourth Sunday of each month
Retirement 401-K program money deducted from your payroll will automatically be rolled over to a Wall Street Investment Banker who will likely squander your money on oil wells in the Gulf of Mexico. If any money is overlooked it will naturally be taxed under the 2big2fail bank bailouts
COMPENSATIONS: New employees will be placed on a 90 day probationary period. If you fail to meet our high standards you will be asked to leave and ineligible for any severance or unemployment claims as well as forfeiture of the $100 dollar background and drug testing.
NOTE : Employees are further advised they may not quit in the probationary period. To do so would cause the corporation to charge for bookeeping and training fees, which are based upon the national averages of $400.00 per week of employment until we locate a suitable replacment for your worthless ass
.
The pay will be calculated on a rate of $10.00 per hour paid as a salary of $400 weekly as executive pay based upon the national average work week of 90 hours weekly to start. All hours above the national average will be considered overtime pay which is forbidden by our board of directors.
Large generous corporation seeks talented individual for long term contract employment. Applicants must posses a Bachelors of Science Degree from a respected university.Further requirements are listed below.
1. You must have a dependable vehicle with insurances for work as travel is required. We don't pay mileage or subsidize for use of your car. (truck or large SUV is preferred)
2. Since you will travel applicants must have a cell phone with GPS and laptop computer to communicate with home office HQ.
3. Applicants must maintain a complete set of tools hammers, saws, wrenches, brooms and brushes.
4. Must be bilingual in English Spanglish and Profanity.
5. Able to work overtime at nights and weekends as our schedules demands.
6. You must have a clean work history and no criminal backgrounds are accepted.
7.You should maintain a credit card and credit score of over 700 and have access to checking and savings at a major bank. We sometimes ask you make purchases for us as we offer 100% reimbursements paid on the 31st day of each month.
8. You must be able to lift a 100 lbs and be in top physical condition.
9. Background check and drug analysis fee of $100 dollar paid by each applicant.
Health Insurance: will be deducted from you salary and coverage is limited to healthy people only
Holiday Pay: we recognize all holidays whether religious or national however holidays must be celebrated on the first and third Saturday of each month
Vacation and Sick Pay: all vacation and sick days will be approved for the second and fourth Sunday of each month
Retirement 401-K program money deducted from your payroll will automatically be rolled over to a Wall Street Investment Banker who will likely squander your money on oil wells in the Gulf of Mexico. If any money is overlooked it will naturally be taxed under the 2big2fail bank bailouts
COMPENSATIONS: New employees will be placed on a 90 day probationary period. If you fail to meet our high standards you will be asked to leave and ineligible for any severance or unemployment claims as well as forfeiture of the $100 dollar background and drug testing.
NOTE : Employees are further advised they may not quit in the probationary period. To do so would cause the corporation to charge for bookeeping and training fees, which are based upon the national averages of $400.00 per week of employment until we locate a suitable replacment for your worthless ass
.
The pay will be calculated on a rate of $10.00 per hour paid as a salary of $400 weekly as executive pay based upon the national average work week of 90 hours weekly to start. All hours above the national average will be considered overtime pay which is forbidden by our board of directors.
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